Fool quotient on the rise in C-11; Bike Rodeo made a splash

Who would have guessed that when they chucked Osama Bin Laden’s carcass off that aircraft carrier, a couple months later his alter ego, Whitey Bin Bulger, would wash ashore in Santa Monica, California, on Third St. Interesting facts, that at different times in his life Whitey lived in St. Monica’s parish and on East Third St, both in Southie. Coincidence? Maybe, but now the White man is spending his summer in Plymouth and Osama swims with the fishes and life goes on as usual or as unusual as is usually the case in this column.

May 27, 7:37 a.m.

A woman looked out of her Codman Square apartment and saw a stranger sitting behind the wheel of her Mercury Mountaineer. The first officer on scene asked the man, “Dude, whose car?” The suspect responded, “Yeah, I know that’s what I’m saying!” The drunken nitwit was arrested for breaking and entering a m/v. The 37-year-old Mattapan man and his 7 aliases have an extensive criminal history.

April 16, 12:38 a.m.

Officers responded to a radio call for a report of a breaking and entering at a Lyndhurst St home. The couple that resides there had come home to find a stranger sleeping on the sofa. On arrival, the officers woke up another drunken boob who insisted that he was at home on Savin Hill Avenue! Two miles away! The 41 year old was promptly arrested.

June 26, 9:20 p.m.

I sense a pattern here. An Orchardfield St .couple came home after a weekend away only to find a one-time friend asleep on their couch. The suspect stated that he found the back door unlocked so he took this as a sign from the inhabitants that he should make himself at home. The officers took this as a sign that the suspect must be a mental case. The 22 year old (whom I have written about before) was arrested for unarmed breaking and entering.

April 29, 12:40 a.m.

Officer Mike Lam was doing his normal mundane patrolling of the Pleasant St. area when a scene out of a Quentin Tarantino movie played out right in front of him. The officer observed the driver of a Nissan Maxima traveling down Pleasant St. toward Hancock St. suddenly speed around a National Grid backhoe, jump the curb, parking on the sidewalk and begin to throw objects at the backhoe. Then the suspect went back to his vehicle, retrieved a long knife and chased after the backhoe, eventually catching up to it and jumping up onto the right side of the machine. The suspect then attempted to stab the operator of the backhoe, but the cabin was shielded by glass and the force of the knife hitting the glass bent the blade. Officer Lam ordered the suspect to drop his weapon and he complied. All this because the 20-year-old loser felt the backhoe was going too slow. Fool.

Our annual Bike Rodeo, on June 11, was a great success, despite the noon time rains. I would like to thank Gail Hobin of UMass, Jeff Brewster, owner of McDonalds, the Vulcan society, and Mr. Bill Trabucco for donating brand new bikes as well as our many volunteers. Also, I would like to thank the members of the Field Corner CDC for their recognition.